We are encouraged to observe the two minutes' silence and it starts right now.

Not sure what I'm supposed to think of, not being religious. Haven't got a god to pray to and can't imagine spirits of dead soldiers.

Think of my grandad, gassed in the Great War, survived, smoked a pipe and died of lung cancer at a ripe old age. He was lucky, but not as lucky as me. Lucky old me didn't even have a draft to avoid.

Think of my old English teacher giving a breathless, luvvy performance of Wilfred Owen's 'Dulce Et Decorum Est' ..... 'Gas! GAS! QUICKBOYS! An ecstasy of fumbling...', and I control a snigger.

Don't think I'll ever grow up.